Binhu: Finding Light Through Running After Loss
Some running journeys don’t begin with goals or races.
They begin with grief.
This First Miles story is about navigating baby loss, finding connection in movement, and discovering that even in the darkest moments, there can be a way forward.
Why I Started Running
Following several experiences of baby loss, I began running.
At the time, it wasn’t about pace, distance, or performance. It was about finding a way to cope, to process emotions that felt too heavy to carry all at once.
After the arrival of my rainbow baby, I wanted to give something back. I signed up for the London Landmarks Half Marathon in 2022 to raise money for Tommy’s, the charity that supported me through that time.
It was there that I discovered a deeper connection to running, something that became more than just movement.
Running Through Grief
Baby loss is something that is often not spoken about enough.
It can feel isolating. Like you’re carrying something no one else can see or fully understand.
During that time, I felt alone. I felt sadness that was hard to explain. I felt like there was no light at the end of the tunnel.
Running became a space where I could feel those emotions without needing to explain them. A place where I could breathe, process, and take things one step at a time.
You Are Not Alone
If you are going through baby loss, or have experienced it, please know this:
You are not alone.
There are people who understand. There are people who have been there. And there is support available, even when it doesn’t feel like it.
One of the most important things is to talk, to share how you’re feeling with someone you trust, even if it feels difficult.
What I Wish I Knew
Looking back, I wish I had known that I wasn’t alone.
At the time, it felt like no one could understand what I was going through. It felt like there was no way forward.
But there was.
There is support out there, and there are communities that care deeply about helping people through these moments.
Finding that support made all the difference.
Finding Meaning in Movement
Running didn’t take the pain away.
But it gave me space to process it.
It gave me something to hold onto. A way to move forward, even slowly, even on the hardest days.
And through that, it became something I truly love.
Starting Your First Miles
Not every running journey starts the same way.
Some begin with excitement. Others begin with healing.
Wherever you’re starting from, your First Miles matter.
Support After Baby Loss
If you or someone you know is experiencing baby loss, support is available.
Tommy's is a UK charity dedicated to supporting people through pregnancy, baby loss, and related complications. They provide expert information, a supportive community, and resources to help you through incredibly difficult times.
Reaching out can feel hard, but you don’t have to go through it alone.
Share Your First Miles
If you have a story about how running has helped you through difficult moments, we’d love to hear it.
Send us your First Miles story by following the link in our Instagram bio.